Multi-subjective

well, sunday was a day i like to brag about. if your a vampire geek, then you would be exited about being bitten on the wrist by another vampire geek. it hurt like hell, but kyle bit me.
there are only two people i would liekt o bite in this world [that i have a chance with] kyle, wich i might bite him next weak, and one other.......he knows who he is....i hope, i have made my love for him very obviouse on many ocasions....

ever get the feeling your pouring your heart into something, and getting no where at all? its a very frusterating feeling, but i guess it cant be helped. all i can really do is be happy for him and his so far so good relationship.

but it really didnt help that he was soooooo hot when i saw him last....sparkling brown eyes and beautiful tan skin....tall slim body.....carelessly beautiful hair.......

GOD DAMMIT WHY CANT I HAVE ANY LUCK WITH GUYS??? IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR A MAN THAT WILL LOVE ME, AND WANT TO BE LOVED BY ME???
IS IT SO RONG FOR ME TO WANT TO LAUGH WITH A GUY AND WATCH A MOVIE WITH HIM, OR KISS HIM? EVERYTIME I THINK I FINALLY FOUND THAT GUY, HE TURNS OUT TO BE A USER!

srsly, james was the worst mistake of my life. i probably should have got that when he started to stick his hands down my pants or up my shirt, but god....now that im watching him do it to some one else, its really easy to see. how could i be so blind? and now that i know what an ugly personality he has, i can see that he was also nasty looking physically....in the face anyway.


i wrote a poem a little while ago.....my teacher read it over my shoulder and said he liked it.

i feel like im fading
my heart beats are numbered
my breathing will stop
my body will slumber

away from the depression
broken away, im free
im n a place where i can be happy
my eyes are open and i can see

theres no crying in this place
only happyness abd bliss
i look down to my life
and there are some things i think ill miss

but for now ill watch them live
and be happy for there life
i have no regrets for where i am
but a new respect for time

i was foolish to end it there
when i had so many years ahead
i should have thought of the people i left
but i thought of my pain instead



i know its a long poem, but i had a lot of time on my hands.......